Wednesday, 30 May 2007

secret girly stuff

Otherwise known as...'the post in which DV tells us about her lastest waxing adventures, with a side order of bra shopping'

Hmm, first the bra shopping.
Working on the assumption that a girl needs more than one bra in her life (good idea) and it's boring owning two of the same type (yup, I'm that clever) I dragged myself to the shops and put myself through the torture that is trying on foundation garments.
too pointy, too ouchy, too strange, too lumpy, too ugly, too squishy, too 'ohmygod they're around my chin now', too expensive, etc etc etc.

Finally found one that seemed comfy, gave a niceish shape and wouldn't involve selling a kdney to afford.
Even found delightfuly pink sparkly (yet still sensible cotton) undies. Every girl needs a pair.

Second time I've worn the bra and it's doing strange things to my bosom line. Sigh!

Somedays a breast reduction, doesn't seem like such a bad plan.
The undies haven't dissapointed me yet though.

...and now the waxing...

I decided a while ago that I would win the war against my slow transformation into the freakishly moustachioed lady (I'm a raunchy creature) and wax that baby away!
I figured that if I was going to sob like a girlygirl from the pain of pulling wax off my upper lip, I would do it at home where no-one could hear my screams.
It was surpringly painless.

I decided yesterday that I would wax my legs (bored of the shaving and the prickly re-growth cycle)
It was surprisingly painless.

I decided today that I would wax my underarms.
It was surprisingly painfull!
I swore a little. Okay, I swore a lot. Okay, I said words that would make a sailor blush!


Miss Jimmy said...

Continuing the theme of oversharing, you are right my friend, the armpits suck balls. I can't do any waxing to myself since Gitta tried to wax my leg at age 13 and ripped off skin. I leave it to professionals now. Yes, I am a big girly girl. Its embarassing too because I giggle all the way through and the beautician thinks I am mad and funny. Having been waxed almost everywhere a girl could ever need to wax the armpits hurt the mostest.
My question is why are you inflicting pain on yourself in winter? Wear pants and jumpers and no one can tell if you are a gorilla underneath!

Hunydd said...

Funny...lots of people seem to think that armpits are ouchy, but I've never had an issue with them. No, I tell a lie - I went to a waxer once who used wax that was too hot. Burns under your arms in the middle of a humid Sydney summer are not fun.

And I am a strong beliver in "find a bra that works, buy 16 of them". Tho it does mean that my underwear drawer is lacking in excitement. Except for the lone g-string that I wore once when I was 25, and I keep to remind me never to wear such a torture device ever again....

Tee hee - hooray for oversharing!

Oh, The Joys said...

Wow. You waxed the underarms? Wow.

JD said...

The whole idea of buying bras in this country, in my size I must point out, is an undertaking of such excremental proportions that I usually only ever do it if I want to feel like a circus freak show ("Roll up, roll up! Come see the woman with the incredible front protusions that are in direct disproportion with the smallness of her back!"). Surprisingly enough, I try to go bra shopping often, only to be disappointed and feel like the aforementioned freak show when all the bras, if they are made in my size at all, look like something my gran would have worn.

There are more colours to the brassiere palette than white, black and beige people! You can do it for eenny, weeny little A cups, why not do it for us larger cups huh? Our boobs are bigger therefore you get better advertising space! (end rant)

Waxing? That's for masochists. If I feel like torture, I go bra shopping.


Destructomeg said...

I've heard tell of the pain of the underarm wax. Never been brave enough myself....

And even I hate finding bras and I'm what I would have thought to be a pretty damn normalish size. Cute things stop at about B cup it seems... and even my normal C-D cups gets stuck with 'sensible' more often than not. And what is it with being unable to be fitted properly by an older lady with a tape measure? That knowledge seems to have all gone... anyone knkow where those nice sensible ladies hide these days?

Wenchilada said...

God, I feel like I need to go to a support group for women who wear sensible, comfy undies that don't match with their bras.

Beige is me...yup...

DV said...

Oh no, my bra and knickers never match, well unless I wear black undies.

I must confess to only really having one semi hairless armpit...the other one is very very patchy...i wonder how much people chage to do one pit?